I don't think I can ever underestimate how important the good people in my life are. Some family and some friends, all essential for the colour and character in my life. The trouble with my ex was that she made every effort to isolate me from my family and friends. Largely I think it was due to her insecurities that she did this, not really out of malice or hatred. She always found a reason why certain people should not be in our lives, it could be as simple as because they drove an S.U.V.
 
Luckily for me my amazing brother and his equally amazing wife made every effort to fit her stringent criteria for being allowed into our lives. It did not trouble them that they had to lie and agree with her often strange beliefs and philosophies. For without them and my once a week visits with my son to their sanctuary (or as they called it their house) I don't think I could have been able to carry on as long as I did before leaving her. My ex never deigned to join us on these visits so it was complete bliss to bask in the nurturing atmosphere of their home and break bread with them. Also my son made an incredible bond with their daughter, his cousin. In truth she was the first child he really played with, completely spontaneously.

I owe them a debt of gratitude they are probably not aware of; like a soldier on leave, or a prisoner on day release, I enjoyed a brief respite from a troubled marriage. I never spoke of her when I was with them, I think in an effort to enjoy the experience of being with them unfettered. It was my brother also who was my deepest confidant and, whilst he respected my desire to keep my marriage alive, he gave some very compelling arguments why it should end. Not least the fact that my son would do better without his mother: a sad indictment to her parenting skills, but none the less true.