Communication

How do you start to communicate with your autistic child, if on first diagnosis your child has no language or at least no verbal way of communicating? What can you do to try to coax your child into speech?

For many months my son spoke his own language which while very entertaining and fascinating to try to comprehend, was not helping him. His language was exclusive to him no other person on earth knew what he was saying the only way I understood, if he wanted something, was when he used sign language.

So I set about trying to encourage spoken words from him. I knew he could speak I had heard him say words, I knew he understood what I was saying because of how he reacted when I spoke to him.

At his daycare, they were using a method, whereby they would call him by his name several times a day then record his reaction. This proved successful as he went from not responding after 5 tries to responding right away like any other child would. I knew progress could be made.

It was very basically a case of giving my son choices, pick one of two things. So kit kat or penguin biscuit. The trick being, that he did not get his choice until he said or at least attempted to say the word required to secure said food item.

I had to be careful not to alert his suspicious side because I learnt early on he was certainly no fool. There was a little bit of a performance required on my part.

At first, he would just look more intently at the thing he wanted almost willing it out of my hand.

It occurred to me then, that I should not to put anything in his eye line and instead just say the word of the thing he wanted. That way he had a good reason to say the word.

I made it like a game and it proved effective. I always congratulated him and told him, 'good talking
son, that was excellent'.

Mine and many other peoples work supporting his language has proved very successful.
He is quite the chatterbox now and obviously enjoys a conversation. 

Children can be cruel

It has been some time since I have written about my son, mainly because he discovered what I was doing and asked me about it. I did not want to say it was a kind of therapy for me so I thought I better just stop especially now that he is in his teenage years. Puberty and autism are not always a good mix. I have a lot of pride and admiration for my son I know it is not easy for him.


When I think of my teenage years, and how excruciating they were, adding autism into the mix, well I can't even imagine what that must be like, and recently he has told me about some bullying he has been a victim of. He was telling me after the fact, something he does a lot, especially when it is something that has upset him greatly.


It is so true that children can be cruel, but I wonder if the children know just how cruel they can be? How much damage they are causing? Someone without autism would have trouble coping with bullying it is perhaps one of the most confusing actions, to make sense of, to a developing mind both cognitively and emotionally. When people who have been bullies, look back and remember what they did many of them are mortified by their behavior. Have little understanding of why they did it and in there later years would never contemplate taking this action again.


It comes from a place of inadequacy, of insecurity a place we all find ourselves in when we are feeling most vulnerable.

We need now in our enlightened and forward thinking society to put this abhorrent behavior into our distant past. We need to teach our young how damaging and far-reaching this behavior is towards our fellow human beings and how what you give out will eventually one day come back to you.